"Odd how things change..."

Today I just realised something that kind of goes hand in hand with yesterday's post about Cambridge Springs: I got the NEAS Journal today and suddenly realise how little I care any more.

It's not that I don't like Nelson anymore; that's not the issue at hand. It's the fact that the journal seems to have become a place for obituaries... plus a good third of this latest issue was just excerpts from letters to Diane that have little or nothing to do with Nelson.

There's not much left to be said that hasn't already been said. If anything.

I guess my priorities are changed. I don't really care to spend money on going to Cambridge Springs now, even if I had it and could go. I'd rather spend the money in a way that is of direct benefit to someone.

I don't think I'm going to continue getting the journal any more after this year is up, either. I would rather send the $25 to someone who needs it for, say, food or clothes. It's nice to help young baritones, but there is a sense of urgency in my heart that time is running out and not to spend very much on fun and indulgences anymore. Investing in the kingdom of God and my own family seems so much more important.

I thank God for all the joy Nelson has brought to me and for the lifepath on which I believe God used Nelson to get me travelling. But the obsession is done and I don't need my Old Dead People to feel fulfilled any more. I have so much to live for NOW, people who need me NOW.

The Old Dead People are in their proper place: to be enjoyed like spice, but not to be my lifework/obsession. Such a lifework won't last, but what I do for my family and for others in the name of Jesus will.

Random stuff

1. I have gotten to October 2005 in my blog transfer. I thought September would never end. Seriously, I was apparently either bored or addicted to memes. Probably both.

2. I am looking forward to revisiting my school days entries.

3. I had cashew cheese sauce macaroni tonight for dinner. And an apple. And more carob peppermint ice cream frozen dessert. Tonight I smothered it in white chocolate chips, chocolate syrup, and coloured sprinkles. It looked like a toddler's birthday party.

4. Molly rolled over a couple more times today. I can't believe she is doing that already. Still no laugh though. She is such a sweet baby. She took her morning nap in her big crib. I'm thinking it will be a good plan to start getting her accustomed to it. I don't see sleeping through the night regularly happening for a while still, but she is going to outgrow her bouncy seat and the swing eventually.

I took her walking twice in her stroller today. Beautiful. day.

5. I burned my lip on a hot noodle tonight.

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